Wednesday

Castles in the air

I have always been a dreamer.
Never does a day past that I didn't spend seconds, minutes and hours letting my mind wander aimlessly.
Sometimes it will go where no men dared tread, to flirt and court with the many morbid mysteries of death, ghosts, demons and the supernatural.
Many have accused me of being morbid when I mentioned thinking about death and what happens after death but for me, what is so taboo about it after all? Everyone dies. No one is immortal (except for the cheerleader in Heroes). So, why the fear?
As for ghosts, demons and the supernatural, these are sentient beings that many do not believe exists. Having seen a few ghosts (honestly! I did see a few and I am not insane) and heard stories about demons and the supernatural which is very much a part of the Asian culture, it is only natural for me to think about them and what are they, where they hang out and what they do all day. Do they have jobs? Do they have families like humans? Things like that.
At times my mind wanders into the haphazard worlds of my characters, who are all sitting around waiting for me to finish telling their stories so that I could get their stories out to publishers and hopefully accepted and published for the world to read.
Often, my characters would take me on weird but interesting journeys into their worlds and they would often lament my lack of speediness in telling their life stories to the real world.
Occasionally I would wander into the 'what if' realm.
We all have our 'what if I suddenly received $1mil' moments and I am no exception.
In younger days, I would dream of frittering away the million bucks on books, clothes and food. As I grow older, the list grew to add in a house and a car. And in recent times, perhaps due to the influence of people around me, the list was erased. The million bucks would be invested in safe government bonds or other safe investments and let it grow. I would use it as the base to make more money and once I reach the target of say, two to three million, I would stop. I'll still leave the original million tied up in investments to continue making money while the extra millions would be used to fulfill whatever material needs I have always lusted after. Of course, it would also mean I will be able to finally quit my job, finally be a stay-at-home mom and fulfill my life-long dream of becoming a romance writer. Part of all that money would also go to charities and organisations I have always supported such as the WWF and RSPCA. It's not because I want to look good as a generous donor but I truly wanted to help and since these organisations are always short of funds, it is the best way to help.
Then when I tire of the 'what if' game, my mind wanders on to concoct evil schemes to get rid of my in-laws once and for all. I am sure almost all married women and men out there can't stand their in-laws and no wonder. It seemed that in-laws are put there to torture and made the lives of their sons and daughters-in-laws' a total hell. My hubby is lucky in a sense that my mom, when she was alive, lived in another country halfway across the world from us and my dad who practically does not even bother to call us unless we called him to pay him a visit. My in-laws are totally different to the point that I have thought up various ways to get rid of them and get away with it!
When guilt over my evil scheming starts to act up, I let my mind wander back to my past and start wondering what had happened to that thin male teacher who taught me history for two years.
Daydreaming has always been a fun activity for me and some may think it is a total waste of time, I felt it has helped me through many tough times, taught me lessons, gave me story ideas and most importantly, kept me alive with imagination and creativity!

Disappearing act and dieting

Between work and family obligations, I have been so caught up and busy for the past weeks that I did not even realise I have not posted anything for a full month!
I remember starting to write a post or two but somehow got interrupted and the post ended up empty and abandoned.
One of the post was to gleefully announce my successful weight loss! I've lost almost 20lbs in the past five months and am darn proud of it! The most amazing part are the inches lost! I lost about 6in off my waistline and dozens more on my upper body, hips and thighs.
I am so happy that I can now fit into a size 10 that I went out to celebrate with chocolates and ice creams!
Though not exactly deprived of my favourite desserts during my Shapeworks/Herbalife diet, as I sometimes do give in and indulge in a chocolate bar or two, I still missed stuffing myself silly with chocolate peanut butter ice cream, chocolate fudge ice cream, dark chocolate, sneakers, Oreos, anything with the word chocolate in it!
Now I weigh 132lbs for my 5'5" medium frame. Though still not my ideal weight and I am still considered a tad on the heavy side for my frame and height, I am happy as it is. My hubby has no complains. I can fit into all my pre-pregnancy clothes and even clothes I bought more than ten years ago. Life is good! I feel healthier and more lively!
I still exercise daily with morning walks and Denise Austin's floor exercise routines. I continue to take the protein shakes once a day instead of twice a day. I made sure to eat healthy meals and allow myself desserts and snacks. Moderation is the key to everything!
Perhaps I may even try to lose another 10lbs to reach my ideal weight but this time, it is not because someone said something nasty to me, it is because I want to show that I can do it if I set my sight to it.
Let's just hope I do not become pregnant again.....